Good Citizens... in today's society we strive to achieve and uphold a strong social conscience. We recognise responsibility, stoicism and integrity as the hallmarks of our existence. And yet the flagrant exploitation of these truths is upon us in the deceptively cartoon like form of The Funky Hot Mamas. Rumor has it that fhm have been sighted openly "shaking it all about" and "getting a wiggle on" to enraptured audiences causing raucous laughter and merriment seemingly at will. Speculation is rife as to the proposed health risks involved in the commission of these two musical mistresses of mayhem. As yet unseen, the writer has no doubt that lasting detrimental effects on the general public will only deepen in time to come. First hand encounters are related to the following admissions.

• "Non stop entertainment and energy..." Julie Ferguson. Wanaka 50th Birthday (not hers we might add)
• "She really is quite mad..." Dr. Ivna Funnybone Therapist for FHM

Based on first hand experience it would seem that those that venture into the "fhm experience" are overwhelmed by the insatiable urge to dance, sing laugh and experience the bold and brassy world that is The Funky Hot Mamas. For up to three frenetic hours willing participants are seduced into thinking that they too can dance with reckless abandon, sing like a Wembley choir, and laugh till they lose all bodily function. Therefore I warn those who intend to experience the Funky Hot Mamas. "Having too much fun can make you feel like you're happy"